REGRETS - THE IF ONLYs

It’s the time of the year once more when the phrase ‘new year’s resolution’ is on everybody’s lips. And again one will see it broken as is always the case with New Year resolutions. There is this other habit which many are prone to indulge in, too – regrets. ‘Wish I may, wish I might that things were in a better light’—that’s the gist of all regrets. Yes, in a better light according to 'you'. Always there is that one thought that things would have been better 'if only'…

If only I had logistical support, if only he was the right boss, if only it happened on a Friday, if only I had said yes to the other job opportunity, if only I had waited a little while longer, if only I didn’t marry too soon, if only I were rich, if only I had said what I truly felt. Each person has his or her list of ‘if only’s’-- regrets which are further pronounced when the going gets tough or when luck and fortune turn sour. Then pine away for things to be different—for the easier way out, the less challenging situation, the less complicated person, the comfortable job, the familiar circumstances-- because we have ‘fears’. We are quick to get frightened or are intimidated easily with struggles, strife, of losing, of facing the unknown; we see troubles as the worst things that could happen to us.

But would it really have been better if things did go our way -- happened the way we wanted it to? Would we be more content, successful, and happier? -- maybe or maybe not. But what about the valuable lessons we had learned from those things which ran opposed to our dreams and ambitions? -- Would we have known them if we had our journey running on smooth ground? Would we have grown wiser or mature-- or worked our way diligently to a truly well-deserved accomplishment or reward?

We were told that the true, genuine and worthy prize comes to those who have battle scars to show from going through the battlefield --- overcoming trials, tests, insurmountable barriers and overwhelming challenges. Indeed because indisputably none can be sweeter than winning over strife—the winning against all odds. The coming through even if things didn’t come our way as we wished they would have-- in the way we wanted it to. Regrets have no place in a man or woman who lives life as best as he or she can. Grieve not for what might have been or wish for things to have been different-- cause what you are and have now is the true meaning of your life and what you deserve-- and that which you think you may have lost may not have been worth gaining after all— think about it.

posted on Monday, December 26, 2005 1:38 PM