Wednesday, October 24, 2007


Let me tell you a friend’s story. It’s a good one - - something that could nudge us to some bit of serious thinking. I’m writing it down like she’s talking to you. So here goes…..

Okay, I tell myself this morning ---today is the day I’m going to do things differently. Yup, you heard me right --- differently! How different? So different you’d think I’m crazy. But crazy I’m not! When yesterday was a bedlam of nitty-gritty bits which succeeded to upset the day’s balance, today is going to be so serene, tranquil, so nothing. Concerns and issues will have to fend for themselves. Yes... because I’m going to do just that ---nothing. N-O-T-H-I-N-G! Armed with that serious resolve I looked out the bedroom window expecting the birds to applaud my decision but instead was met by downcast skies, a small wind blowing here and there, and carpenters hammering on a neighbor’s roof two houses away. Oh well, that’s fine with me, anyway a boring day makes for a good backdrop to a do-nothing resolve. lolz

My youngest daughter popped her pretty head inside the door “Hey, Mom…. Do something for me? ‘Got this dress at the seamstress I need for Saturday’s party. But got meetings lined up today so I can’t get it myself, Thanks.” But before she could pop back out the door I said “Oh you can do that when you get back tonight; anyway she closes at nine. And it’s only Thursday today.” I smiled “…and close the door behind you please.” I added going back to the book I was reading ‘The Purpose Driven Life’.

The phone rang on my bedside table “Hello…Viviane!” came my friend's voice sounding so 'angry'. “There you are! ‘been trying to reach you since last night. Since when do you sleep early?! You know this Bella bitch?! (Oops! Her words not mine lolz) … She’s been telling the girls that you’re fat, that your lasagna is a flop, and that you can’t even balance your bank account!! I can’t wait to wring her neck! YOU should! So when are WE going to do that??!” “Hey, Melinda, calm down.” I smiled amusedly at my best friend’s tirade “Give it another day. We’ll do that after I finish my book. Call you tomorrow.” JWell, let’s see….. 120 lbs is fine sez my doctor last week lolz. And the lasagna… aww, you can’t win them all! N’way never had culinary illusions of grandeur in the kitchen lolz! Hey ---a bank account?! Hahah… twenty-five years ago I didn’t have a wallet to my name.J Now where was I …..? Hmm page 23…

A knock on my door…“Mom...” my eldest son this time “Mrs. Dan is at the gate, has something to tell you.” “Oh okay, coming.” So I reluctantly placed my book on the table and went to the gate. “Hi! Why don’t you come in, Elsa?” I addressed my visitor --- Middle forties, short-cropped hair, creases visible round the eyes; thick round the waist, but even in her casuals still looked stylish and chic. “Thank you, but I won’t be long.” She replied “The ladies would like to invite you to join our walking club. We’re meeting tomorrow at 6am.” It didn’t take me an eternity to reply …‘Would be a pleasure, truly, but. . my early mornings are quite frenetic with chores lolz! – you know, breakfast, packed office lunch…all that stuff. But thanks for inviting me. When things go slack, I’ll let you know and join up.” JHahahah… Oh I know some wives who would grab the first chance to get into an ‘elite club’ like theirs, but frankly I’ve got better things to do. No kidding! Like… being mother to my children… lolz…. And Yup, like enjoying a good book too ….. J Besides the morning walks I do works just fine for me. Oh I’ve got nothing against exclusive clubs; they have its uses too… like hooking up to the grapevine? Lolz So much for that, where’s page 23 again….?

Gosh, I must have reacted or responded quite ‘strangely’ to those situations mentioned above. A normal person would probably do these >>> Run off to the seamstress without wasting any time and get the dress for daughter. – Get heated up and furious over the imagined slight and storm her way to the bitch’s (oops!) lair for confrontation. - Join up with the club and be in the company of the so-called elite class and be privy to the juiciest gossip in town, right? Am I weird or something?! Oh boy!

Gee, why this ‘pressure’ or ‘push’ to always ‘do something’ no matter what or regardless of?! Must we do something because we have to or is expected of us, or because everybody does it, even if it isn’t right or feels not right? What if in doing so, we tend to encourage our children’s laziness, promote further bitchiness in people, or be tagged ‘keeping up with the Joneses’ – a social butterfly. That’s not cute! What’s wrong with teaching your children to be responsible adults? Or behaving with restraint when confronted with ‘bitchy’ news? Or be discerning with things that have no ‘intrinsic value’, are superficial or unnecessary…… and opt to be true to one’s principles instead? Is that bad?

So how am I doing now? Great! I must say ---cool, calm, and collected. Come to think of it, everything seems fine. No unrealistic demands or pressures on my time. Feeling so relaxed, feeling freer to be me. My family has come to respect and appreciate that. I say that certainly feels good. What this exercise has taught me today is to uphold one’s genuineness as a person. That’s a big word? Oh, you know what I mean by that, silly. Lolz Yup, I have learned to exercise restraint or discernment on issues or concerns which impinge on my time and day --- Things that don’t have to be ‘there’ at all. Of course that does not include concerns of top priority which certainly have to be responsibly and promptly addressed. Oh, but don’t we all know that?!! Lolz

And that ends her story. She’s right about this. With priorities in place, other things besides may be quite unnecessary to us. One should learn to say ‘No” sometimes -- seek out better things of true value and worth instead to fill our time with. Life is short and time precious -- why waste it on 'unessentials'. So how ‘bout it, got your own ‘do-nothing’ resolve story to tell? J

posted on Friday, August 25, 2006 10:07 AM

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